Saros's breathing quickened, his heart racing as if he were back on the Celest, surrounded by assimilated crew members. His muscles tensed, ready for a fight that wasn't there. A bead of sweat formed on his brow, betraying his struggle for control.
He blinked hard, trying to dispel the intrusive memories. Vanik's face blurred, momentarily replaced by the lifeless eyes of the scientists he'd failed to protect. Saros's hand trembled, reaching for a phaser that wasn't at his side.
With extreme effort, Saros turned away, his movements jerky and uncoordinated. He stumbled to a nearby alcove, pressing his back against the wall, eyes darting, scanning for threats that existed only in his mind. In the relative “safety” of the alcove, Saros tried to steady his breathing, to recite Vulcan mantras of logic and control. But the words slipped away, replaced by a loop of failure - the Celest, Vanik, his duty, his family.
His ocular implant pulsed erratically, each flash bringing a new fragment of traumatic memory. Saros pressed his palms to his temples, a futile attempt to physically hold back the flood of emotions and memories threatening to overwhelm him. He breathed in. He was in control…Inhale 4, exhale 6. Feel the air on your lips….. He was in controol….
*As the episode slowly subsided, Saros was left drained, his Vulcan composure in tatters. The logical part of his mind struggled to rationalize what had just happened, he breathed in. As he glanced down the hallway, hoping that Vanik saw nothing. He could… Go back to his quarters…. Meditate some and…Stragetize from there…..He turned the other way and moved to leave. *
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